Tip #1 - Be Emphatic and Nonjudgmental: When someone says or does something you perceive as weird or irrational, try not to judge or discount their feelings.
Tip #2 - Respect Personal Space: If possible stand 1.5 to 3 feet away from a person who's escalating. Allowing personal space tends to decrease a person's anxiety and can help you prevent acting-out behavior.
Tip #3 - Use Nonthreatening Non-Verbals: The more a person loses control, the less they hear your words-and the more they react to your nonverbal communication. Be mindful of your gestures, facial expressions, movements and tone of voice.
Tip #4 - Avoid Overreacting: Remain calm, rational, and professional. While you can't control the person's behavior, how you respond to thir behavior will have a direct effect on whether the situation escalates or defuses.
Tip #5 - Focus on Feelings: Facts are important, but how a person feels is the heart of the matter. Yet some people have trouble identifying how they feel about what's happening to them.
Tip #6 - Ignore Challenging Questions: Answering challenging questions often result in a power struggle. When a person challenges your authority, redirect their attention to the issue at hand.
Tip #7 - Set Limits: If a person's behavior is belligerent, defensive, or disruptive, give them clear, simple, and enforceable limits. Offer concise and respectful choices and consequences.
Tip #8 - Choose Wisely what you Insist Upon: It's important to be thoughtful in deciding which rules are negotiable and which are not.
Tip #9 - Allow Silence for Reflection: We've all experienced awkward silence. While it may seem counter-intuitive to let moments of silence occur, sometimes it's the best choice. It can give a person a chance to reflect on what's happening and how he or she needs to proceed. Believe it or not silence can be a powerful communication tool.
Tip #10 - Allow Time for Decisions: When a person is upset, they may not be able to think clearly. Give them a few moments to think through what you've said. A person's stress rises when they feel rushed. Allowing time brings calm.